Elfie, P3

"Welcome to Riverdale!" I grinned. The sizeable village had a big river that ran through the center of it, providing its namesake. It was a common sight to see ducks and children playing in the cool water.

"It's really nice," Elfie commented, munching on an apple. She spat out a seed, accidentally hitting a duck with it. It merely quacked at her before ruffling its feathers, shaking off the offending apple seed. Elfie did a small gasp. "Even the ducks are civilized!" I laughed.

"Yes, the animals and people here are very nice," I smiled as we hitched our horses by the stables.

"OI! YOU ROTTEN NUTTINS! GET BACK HERE!" a man roared down the road.

"What's going on?" Elfie asked. "I thought everyone here was nice. And what's a nuttin?"

"It's mean slang used for poor children," I explained, looking on towards the commotion. We didn't have to wonder what was going on long before a group of three kids came darting from the crowd running from a large man with elephant ears.

"Run Josie! He's right behind us!" one of the kids yelled to a girl who looked younger than the other two. The kid who had yelled looked to be the oldest, a girl holding a melon under one arm and holding the younger girl's hand in her other hand. The older girl had fox ears and a fox tail, Josie having a mouse tail and a small pair of mouse ears adorning her head.

"Jackson fell!" Josie screeched as the boy in their trio tripped on his own tail.

"Keep running Josie. You know where to go," the older girl said, pushing Josie along and nearly making her drop an armful of fruit. Josie was off, the older girl picking up the boy and attempting to dart away, only to be stopped by the large man.

"Give back my fruit you little nuttins!" he barked.

"Not until you stop overcharging the poor people!" the girl replied, kicking dirt at the man. "We need to eat too!"

"You live right on the river! Eat some fish!" the man argued.

"My brother here doesn't eat meat, jerk!" the girl growled. The little boy had a monkey tail, and he was holding on to it in fear of the monolithic man before him.

"That's not my problem, is it?"

"It is now!" Elfie yelled, hurling a stick at the man. Everyone went silent for a minute before the man turned and stomped towards Elfie.

"What'd you say, dwarf?" he asked. I cringed. Considering her reaction when I called her a little girl, this would not end well. I could feel the anger radiating off Elfie as if I were next to the top of a volcano.

"You have giant ears, you should've heard me fine," she said. "Leave those kids alone. You can afford to lose a few fruit. Back off."

"Yeah? You steal some too? That why you're defending these nuttins? I see that big lump in your bag. Bet you stole a melon yourself!" the man yelled, wrenching the bag from Elfie.

"Hey! That's mine! Give it back!" Elfie said. "You can't touch that!" The man reached inside, but before he could withdraw the orb, Elfie drove the butt of her spear into his throat, catching the satchel as he dropped it. The crowd gasped.

"Someone call the guards!" the man yelped, coughing. Guards appeared in no time, and luckily the pair of kids had scrammed before they arrived.

"What's going on this time, Franklin?" one of them asked. "This is the ninth time today." I tensed up, noticing the guard had a dog tail.

"This kid attacked me! She has stolen fruit!"

"He tried to take my stuff! I stole absolutely nothing!"

"Calm yourselves!" the guard yelled, waving his fuzzy tail in annoyance. My ears twitched and my whiskers felt like I needed to run a hand over them to calm them, so I did so. The guard looked at me as soon as I moved my hand. "You there. What happened here?" I froze mid swipe.

"Um. Well, there were some kids who got some fruit, and the man was yelling at them so my companion defended them. Then he noticed our bag and the roundness of it and assumed we stole a melon and tried to take it," I explained. "So she hit him with her spear."

"Well, considering Franklin, this sounds very plausible. Mind if we check your bag?" the guard asked.

"You can't!" Elfie hissed.

"Lady, if you have nothing to hide then it shouldn't matter," another guard said. Elfie growled.

"Fine, but don't touch it, you'll break it," Elfie reluctantly said, removing the orb from the bag. "This is what he thought was a melon."

"What is it?" the head guard asked.

"I'd prefer not to say in front of a large crowd. It's dangerous enough since I showed it to you. In fact, I would like you to escort me to the leader of this place," Elfie said, stowing the orb away.

A few minutes later, we stood in a longhouse in front of the leader of this chunk of land, Lord Drevis. He answered directly to the king so I guess he was a safe bet to talk to about the Vessel of Sky.

"What's all this?" he asked, grooming his long beard. I was happy to see he was among a feline species, a lion.

"Lord Drevis, this girl demanded to see you," the dog guard stated.

"Alright. I'll let her then. What do you need?" he asked kindly.

"Sir, my name is Elfie Stuffins from the Temple of Elements. I am one of many sacred guardians charged with protecting an elemental Vessel. One of your citizens tried to take it from me so I had to attack him. If he comes in trying to blame me, just know that he could've caused great calamity," Elfie said.

"Proof?"

Elfie showed him the Vessel of Sky, explaining what it was and giving him the same spiel she had given me when I had asked what it was and why it was important.

"So needless to say, I would like safe passage to where I need to go, please," Elfie finished. She showed the lord on the map where we needed to go, and he nodded.

"Anything for a possible future Councilmember, Miss Stuffins. Is there anything your friend needed?" he asked, looking to me.

"Yes, actually," I said, snapping out of my thoughts. "Is it alright if you dispatch someone to join us on our journey? It's a long way to that cave and I know the roads are ridden with bandits and beasts. I'm not skilled in combat and Elfie, as skilled as she is, is only one person. If she is dispatched, then I will be as well." The lord pondered for a moment before shouting, "EMERSON! GET YOUR BLOODY ANTLERS DOWN HERE!" I stood there awkwardly, Elfie looking at me in confusion for answers, but I had none. Soon a young man with a magnificent pair of deer antlers came into the hall.

"Yes, Lord Drevis?"

"These ladies need an escort. Be wary; the pale one is not a little girl and is very strong. She is a guardian of the Vessel of Sky," Drevis explained. Emerson's eyes widened.

"A... a guardian?" he stuttered. He straightened up again, resuming his guardly stiffness. "I will see it through, Lord."

"Wonderful. Here's some gold to aid you on your journey. You'll need it!" Drevis laughed, handing us a bag.

"Thank you!" Elfie and I chimed, then we were on our way. As soon as we were out of the longhouse, Emerson started on a long interview of questions for us.

"What's it like being a cat? What does that orb do? Are you really a guardian? What do they do? How do you live and such?" he shot off. Elfie, enjoying the attention, gladly answered his questions, though I answered when they were directed to me.

We had a new companion and I liked him well enough. He added some sound to our otherwise silent walk on our horses. It was a welcome change and I figured this adventuring thing was pretty fun. I put down the hood of my short cloak. Off we went to more unknown places!

Elfie, P2

This is how I imagine Elfie waking Jasmine up.

"Hey, Jasmine."

I groaned.

"Jaaaaaaasmiiiiiiiine."

I groaned once more, tossing my pillow over my head.

"Wake up!" a small voice shouted in my ear, my covers being ripped from my body accompanied by a little chirp.

"I don't want to work the mill today..." I mumbled. "It's boring..."

"Mill? Oh, wake up!" the voice yelled louder, flicking my nose. I bolted up.

"I'm awake! Don't flick my nose!" I shouted. I rubbed my eyes to get the sleep out of them then looked at my talking alarm clock. It was Elfie. I thought I had dreamed her.

"Come on, we have a long day ahead of us!" Elfie said. "You were supposed to come back to my cave this morning and you ended up sleeping through it!"

"Ooh," I said, remembering last night. "Sorry."

"Hmph. Well, apology accepted," Elfie responded. "I got some supplies before I got here. Look through them. I know you know this place better than me so if there's anything we're missing we can go pick it up."

"Okay..." I yawned. I peered into her little knapsack. It had a small amount of food and water along with her orb and a small journal. There wasn't much room for anything.

"No map, compass... You know we need more than just scraps of food and water, right?" I muttered.

Elfie scoffed. "Do I look like I have room for stupid things?" I nodded in response, digging through my drawers of my tiny hut.

"I have a bag I can put stuff in. I'll put my compass and map in. Then let's hit up the market and get some rope and rent some horses," I commented.

"Horses?" Elfie tilted her little head. I nodded. I got dressed, gathered the rest of my things, slipped on my spectacles, and we were off to the market. Despite her old age, Elfie looked just like a little kid in amazement. She was staring wide-eyed at some of the animals and people.

"Jasmine, do all your people have odd appearances?" she asked.

"How do you mean?"

"Well, you have ears and a tail like a feline and that man over there has scales! That child has the ears and tail of a rabbit!"

"Yeah, that's a part of our race. We all have animal parts. We got them as a gift so we could be more friendly with animals." Elfie nodded in understanding, making a note in her little journal. The sky was a bright blue, pale wispy clouds floating by. Pigs and chickens wandered around freely, oinking and clucking at passerby. A little boy with bandages on his knees stopped to pet a pig and it squealed in glee. His mother was sitting nearby talking with an old woman who ran a sewing shop. The further into the little village we got, the closer to the liveliness of the market we got. Bustling and brilliant, deals were being made all around us. A man bought a goat at a nearby stall while across the way children bartered for candy and sweets. Elfie seemed even more amazed, but suddenly cautious.

"I need to be careful. I could easily break my orb here," she said. As she said this, a kid bumped into her and nearly knocked her over while I dodged around people seamlessly. I heard Elfie cry out as another person bumped her and I made my way back to her, grabbing her hand then lifting her to my shoulders. She pouted.

"What's wrong?" I inquired.

"This is absolutely embarrassing for a woman of my standing!" she cried.

"Elfie, to everyone here you look like a weird little girl. I only say weird because you don't have any animal parts on you," I added quickly. She made a 'hmph' sound and continued to pout. She said she was one hundred whatever years old, but she acted like a child sometimes. It was honestly adorable. I made my way to a stall that sold supplies for traveling, purchasing rope and other amenities. Once I made my way out of the market and to the stable that was on the edge of town, I put Elfie down and rented a pair of horses. Elfie got a smaller one and I got a sweet brown mare.

"Be careful with Judith and Maston," the stable hand said, ducking to avoid catching an antelope horn on a tree. "They're hardy but they need a break too. Be safe on your travels, Jasmine, and young lady!"

We set out on our horses, and as we trotted along Elfie giggled. "Now that is how you treat a guardian properly! That man knows how to treat a woman."

"You're only saying that because people keep calling you a little girl."

"Shush. We need to head to that mountain over there into a cave around the base of it," Elfie said, pointing to the base of a mountain in the distance.

"Well, it's doable. We can just hop from village to village. I'm sure there's one there too so we can rest before we head in," I reasoned. Elfie nodded, Maston whinnying beneath her.

New Assignment; Starting a Story! P1 of Elfie!

So I have a new assignment in my class, and we can blog about whatever we want so long as it keeps up with a theme. So what's mine? Well, I'm going to be writing an ongoing story! Hopefully, it'll end by the end of the year...
I'm going to begin the story in this post. To introduce the story, it'll be a story about an enigmatic girl named Elfie found in a cave by our main character, Jasmine. Elfie is a young girl who has been surviving on her own in an unfamiliar land, but with Jasmine's aid, Elfie will be able to complete what she needs to do, not that she's willing to tell Jasmine much at the start. Let's get started!

Elfie

Adventuring through a dark forest in the middle of the night is normally considered a behavior of deviance in my sweet little village considering all the tales about monsters and witches that hang around during the night in the forest. I wasn't scared. If there really were witches and monsters, then I could always find the source and stop them from... well, existing. Drive them out or something. I just wanted to explore the forest in peace.

Explore I did, and as I found trinkets and all sorts of interesting little baubles, I saw a pale blue glow off in the distance shining through the thicket of trees. It looked to be coming from the tall mountain that shielded our village from the worst of storms. I made my way there, excited to see what the source of the glow was. A mystical waterfall? A star? Maybe something magical?

I trampled my way through the forest to the base of the mountain and saw the light coming from a cave. However, getting to the cave would require quite a bit of climbing. I wasn't deterred though and began my hurried ascent. A few falling rocks and slips later, I reached the cave. The glow was bright yet soft. Taking a breath, I entered the cave, following the glow. Within about ten minutes, I had reached the source. It wasn't a waterfall, a star, but maybe something magical.

The source of the glow was a blue orb, about the size of a watermelon, sitting in a pile of large leaves. In a corner on another bed of leaves and vines, a little girl lay asleep, her body curled up under a blanket woven from vines. She had pale skin and long, blonde hair. A little box sat at the end of her makeshift bed holding some fruit from the trees in the forest. I nearly whistled, impressed. It was hard to get the orange, slightly glowing fruit from the tall trees of the forest for even me, let alone a little girl. I turned my attention to the orb. Its interior looked like it had swirling blue gas or liquid in it. I went to touch it when I heard a scuffle.

"Don't!" a small voice came from behind me. I turned to see a spear in my face. The little girl stood there at the other end of the weapon, wearing only a dirty white dress that had only straps to keep it up and ended at her knees in a frayed hem. She wore no shoes and had a vine tied around her waist, a large brown cloth pouch hanging from it. "Who are you?"

I took a breath. "My name is Jasmine. I hail from a nearby village named Josenine."

"I've never seen a village anywhere near here. Why are you wandering around in the middle of the night? Shouldn't you be asleep or something?" the little girl asked.

"I wanted to explore and I saw a blue glow and wanted to know what it was," I explained. The little girl eyed me suspiciously. She then moved her spear to her side.

"It looks like you're telling the truth. Do you know anything about this land?" she asked.

"Yeah, lived here my whole life."

"Wonderful. In that case, you are going to help me in my quest. I don't know this land or anything and I need a guide. Before you attempt to refuse, just know that it would make up for waking me up during the few hours of sleep I get," the little girl said. "We leave at dawn. We can stop in your village to pick up your things and supplies."

"Woah, woah, woah, little girl--"

"I am one hundred six years old! I am not a little girl!" the girl barked. She softened. "I guess I should explain. I am not of your kind. Forgive me for snapping there, I forgot that your kind doesn't look like mine."

"Okay..." I trailed off. "I'll help you. It'll give me more adventure than what I have here. Just explain the orb and... everything."

"I can't tell you much since we just met, but I'll give you a basic rundown. To start, my name is Elfie. I'm one hundred six years old and one of few guardians of the elemental vessels," she gestured to the orb. "Mine is the Vessel of Sky. Each Vessel contains special powers and if they're not where they're supposed to be, bad things happen. For example, my Vessel can gift many great powers to an organism, but if taken from its proper place, it will cause the sky to die." She took a deep breath.

"What do you mean, cause the sky to--"

"I mean your sun will stop shining, the moon will stop bringing light to the darkness of night, birds and flying creatures will begin to die or lose their ability to fly, there won't be any clouds, and storms will be so much worse," Elfie interrupted. "Finally, the atmosphere will begin to dissipate and everything will die. Each elemental vessel being removed from their proper pedestal will have similarly devastating effects relating to their element. Make sense?" I nodded. "Good. You may head to your village now. Come back here in the morning and we can begin." With a prompt goodbye, I headed back home. On my way home as I mulled over the information that had been dumped upon my mind, I noticed a flock of birds on the ground. They were jumping and flapping their wings, but not able to get airborne. As I approached, instead of fleeing to the sky, they squawked and tried to hop away. The same thing happened with a falcon I found stuck in a tree. Instead of fleeing, the falcon stayed with me, hopping to follow me before I picked it up and perched it on my shoulder. I cringed at the talons digging into my skin, but eventually, I grit my teeth and dealt with it.

At home, I realized what Elfie was saying and the birds' inability to fly couldn't have just been pure coincidence. I had to help her, if not for her or for waking her up, for the poor falcon that now rested in a makeshift nest I put together. I named it Morana.

I watched the moon from my bedside window, then tried to sleep. I had to help Elfie. I had to. Despite how tired I was and how bad the situation was, my heart raced for the upcoming adventure.

30-Day Challenge: Welcome to the End

We've reached it. The end. Finally. It's over. Pretty much, anyway.



But I did so bad.

Wow. I did so bad. I kinda let go around the end, just did the breathing and totally didn't write the 5 things, the 4 things, or the bucket list stuff. I thought my challenge choice would work for someone procrastinating like me. Well. Apparently, that didn't really work. At least I kept up with two things every day. Holy cake.

So let's go over everything. My purpose with this challenge was to improve myself and better handle my mental disorders. That purpose has been achieved, for the most part. That was also my goal. It wasn't easy, especially since my mental disorders hindered me quite a bit, but I managed to do it. Sure, I revised some things along the way (such as writing the 5 and 4 things down so I didn't repeat and also made a rule to not repeat on those) but even so, it was still difficult.

Honestly, I thought it was fun. It gave me something to do and it added to my day. I did end up starting to ignore the notification on my phone telling me to write the 5 and 4 things and to add to my bucket list, which was honestly quite stupid of me to do. Despite that, I think it helped like I thought it would. I might want to add more deep breaths, to be honest. Like in yoga. I probably should've done that differently. Three deep breaths more than three times a day.

So to anyone wanting to do this challenge, here's some advice: STAY ON YOUR GAME. This isn't easy (thus why it's called a challenge) and it's really easy to just totally forget to do pretty much anything on the list of five things. I would've if it weren't for the notifications (even though I ignored the more important one).

Remember: You can do this.

So, welcome to the end, mi amigos y amigas. I hope my fellow peers didn't suck as bad as I did at this. Okay, maybe at least one or two so I know I didn't suck alone. For now, it's the end of one series of blog entries....

....and majestically jumping to the next.

That's all I have for you guys. Peace out!

30-Day Challenge: Halfway There!

Oh yeah. Halfway there.

Hello, hello, my wonderful people. We're at the halfway point of this challenge. How have I kept up?

Well.

I definitely have fallen behind a little on some things. That's what catching up is for, though!

....I have no integrity. I really need to stop being so busy.

On the other paw, I now get to work my brain more to come up with things I love about myself and life and for the bucket list. Hopefully, everyone else is doing better than I am. Besides forgetting to do some things, it's otherwise going very well. I feel happier overall and like I'm doing way better.

To anyone just now reading, here's the plan for my 30-Day Challenge:

• Name 5 things I love about myself
• Name 4 things I love about life/being alive
• Take 3 deep breaths 3 times a day
• Make 2 people smile and/or laugh
• Add 1 thing to my bucket list
• And as a bonus, write on Wattpad or on here.

My goal with this is to improve my well being and how I handle my mental disorders better so I can feel better about myself and so I can learn to not hate or fear my mental disorders but instead to respect them. Despite the difficulties with keeping up with all five things every day, I haven't really revised anything other than to just catch up if I miss something one day and to write down the five things and the four things. There were a few things I considered adding but I figured everything to do was difficult to remember enough as it is along with three different medications a day (at least two of them I do around the same time. Woo.).

The difficulties with this challenge mainly are actually remembering to do them. The only things I've managed to keep up with are the deep breaths and making two people smile and laugh every day. Generally, it happens to have been the same two people most days. Those are probably the easier parts of this. The harder parts are probably the five things, the four things, and the bucket list, as all those require me to have something on hand, either a computer or my bucket list and a pen. Despite those minor annoyances, I've learned a lot about myself, like how to better handle my mental disorders when they do their thing and the things I tend to do when they are doing their thing. This challenge has been meeting my expectations even more so than I expected with how much it's been helping me.

So I have those problems. How do I fix them to keep up with the things I have to do each day? I figure having a reminder on my phone like I do my deep breathing will definitely help. Asking the two closest people in my life to remind me to do these things would also be helpful. The main problem is that I forget to do the things, so having the constant reminder and not doing anything until they're done would likely help me keep up.

Yeah. Go having friends.

I had a few doubts about this thing, but I'm very grateful I've been doing it. The finish line is in sight, and I will make sure at least once during this thing I actually do all five (maybe even the bonus as well) things before the end of the day. Maybe that'll be a mini challenge. Challengeception. Woo. That's all I have at the moment so peace out people scouts.

No, I don't have a small obsession over cats.

It's a large one.

The Challenge So Far

Guess what?

I'm back.

Hello, hello! So here's an update on how the challenge is going so far.

I've been forgetting a few things (such as putting something on the bucket list or writing the things I love about life and myself) some days but I'll do a 'catch up' as I call it. I'll just do whatever I forgot twice; once for the day I missed doing it, and once for that day. Despite a few things I missed every now and then, I've managed to keep up! What's better is I can feel myself improving. I don't feel like I have as much anxiety and I feel more relaxed. It could be the medication I got started on, but I'm gonna say this challenge is definitely helping. My therapist thought it was a cool thing too and he said he's impressed and proud that I'm trying so hard to improve myself and help kick the metaphorical butt of my mental disorders. Woo.

I do find it interesting how this challenge is also about helping myself with my mental disorders as well as getting a grade in class. Woah. School is helping me in a healthy way.

At first, my closest friend and my significant other both would look at me weird when I'd stop mid-conversation to do my breathing, but now they're starting to remind me. This is very helpful since sometimes the reminder on my phone doesn't work or I won't have my phone on me. With their help, it's starting to be a thing I don't have to have a reminder for (though naturally, I will still have those helpful little nubs because I'm a forgetful little nerd). At first the breathing and such was a chore, but now I enjoy doing these things. I'm definitely challenged to come up with five different things I love about myself and four different things I love about life as I've nearly repeated so many times and I run out of ideas quicker since I'm naming so many things. However, I must prevail!

I am enjoying the challenge so far. I feel like a new 'me' is going to emerge, a 'me' who can feel the depression and the anxiety, accept it, and move on. While perusing the interwebs, I found this quote:

And I thought it fit my goal with this challenge pretty well. While I was thinking about having a goal with this challenge, I wondered if my fellow classmates had any major goals with theirs besides getting a grade.

I hope my classmates are doing okay with their challenges. If you're a classmate reading this, good luck broskis. If you're a reader from Wattpad, oh hai. You guys get a bigger peek into the real me instead of the alias I use for Wattpad. If you're some random person who stumbled here, oh hai. How's it goin'?

That's all for now, I suppose. I'm running out of things to say and I have to save my words for later. Peace out!

30-Day Challenge: Day 1

Why hello everyone. I've returned to let you all know how the 30-Day Challenge has gone so far.

even though it's the first day.

So, it's actually been a bit more difficult than I imagined. The tasks themselves aren't the hardest things to do. Instead, it's actually remembering to do them. I set a ton of reminders last night and I still forgot to do some. I think with the things that I love about myself and about life, I'm going to write them down for two reasons:

1. To help me remember to do it

2. To make sure I don't repeat the same things twice or more.

I did everything today so far except for my breaths before I go to bed as it is the afternoon currently. I listed five things I love about myself, took my breaths this morning and at lunch, and listed four things I love about life. I also have managed to make two people smile and laugh today along with added a new item to my bucket list. I've managed to do everything today, but I really gotta be more on top of my game. I think I might add something to the list, like three breaths every school period or something to make it more difficult, but I think I'll stick to what I have. I don't think I was allowed to change anything anyways!

Remembering to do these things is what's most difficult, especially since I'm not a morning person for my morning breaths, when I also have to take some medication. Luckily, it's working out for the most part. I actually feel pretty nice already. Once I remember to actually do the things on my list and get more on top of it, I'm sure I won't feel as hurried like I did. 

OTHERWISE, I am doing quite well. This is a short little post but just a little update on day one. Peace out everyone!

30-Day Challenge: Start Tomorrow!

Greetings everyone! I hope you all had a lovely weekend. I hope it was filled with relaxation for you. Mine was for sure. It was also filled with me lying in my bed pondering what to do for this 30-Day Challenge. I had a few ideas, especially after finally seeing my therapist on Thursday.

There were all sorts of ideas floating through my head. The main question I had to ask myself with them was "Is this something I'm actually going to keep up for a month?" I've tried asserting habits in my life multiple times, but sometimes the ones I actually want don't stick. This is also, of course, due to a simple lack of time. So I had to think of something that I knew I could manage to keep up for a month that didn't take too much time out of my regular routine of things. Meditation came to mind but I didn't know how long that would take, or a guided meditation to bring me into sleep. That latter one would work but the times that I go to bed tend to vary. I could try to go to bed at the same time every night but that would be too big of a change.

Finally, I came up with something right as I sat down in my class, Chromebook at the ready. It has a 5, 4, 3, 2, 1 sort of set up. I use a similar set up for a grounding technique I learned, though this time I'll be using it as a way to keep myself from getting depressed as easily.

Every single day for thirty days, I will have to do this.

• Name 5 things I love about myself

• Name 4 things I love about life

• Take 3 deep breaths in the morning, at lunch, and before I go to bed

• Make at least 2 friends smile and laugh

• And finally, add 1 thing to my bucket list

• And if I can, as a bonus, write an entry about whatever comes to mind on here or Wattpad at the end of the day

(I really want a typewriter though)

I made a bucket list a while ago (and lost it for a short bit of time before I found it buried under my pile of pillows) and found it was a great way to make me look forward to life when I otherwise was filled with thoughts of ending it. Since I finally found it, I've only added a few things then stopped. It now lies waiting to be written in again somewhere in my backpack. Writing a bucket list just gave me a reason to keep thinking of ways to keep going.

From research and advice given to me in years past, naming things you love about yourself can help you be more accepting of yourself, help you learn to love yourself, and help you learn to forgive yourself. Of course, loving myself shouldn't be the only reason I want to be alive, so I want to name some things I love about being alive and life in general from nature to the people in it. 

As for the deep breaths, I tend to be tense most of the time and I can get anxiety all too easily; just not having my phone on me 24/7 gives me anxiety as someone could be messaging me asking for help or my mom could be trying to contact me with news I can't otherwise easily receive. I think about those things. Deep breaths help and as those periods of the day are usually when I find myself most affected by anxiety besides maybe certain class periods, I think overall it'd be helpful if I took those deep breaths.

One of my favorite things to do is make people smile and/or laugh. It's amazing to see their eyes light up when you tell them how important they are or when you tell them a stupid joke. What I feel can sometimes resonate with what someone I'm close to and interacting with feels, especially when they're in a bright and happy mood. So, if they're smiling and laughing, I will be too.

Finally, writing is a good way for me to cope and get things out of my system in a healthy way, besides drawing, so I want to do that too. besides, writing it really fun anyways

Overall, this little challenge is going to help me improve myself. Go ahead and try this for yourself and do it along with me or just do it as you go. I feel as if this will benefit me and the people around me in multiple ways. What are those multiple ways, you ask? I'M GLAD YOU ASKED DEAR READER.

FOR ONE THING, it'll help me cope and be able to utilize healthier ways of calming myself down and keeping calm. My mind can go from lazily thinking, "What did you just say?" to hyper speeding "What happens if this happens? What if this happens? What if they think this? This isn't going to happen, there's no way. I need this in case x happens. Should I bring this or leave it at home? What happens if I do? What happens if I don't? Oh, this will happen if I do and this will happen if I don't!" My mind blows things out of proportion sometimes like that because that's what anxiety does, which can help cause more depression than I'm already affected with, which can cause more anxiety, and then I'm in this circle of despair. SO! This is my way of breaking out of this circle, saying "Screw you circle, I'm going somewhere else." 

This tends to be what the circle of despair would look like. Screw you, circle.

But oh dear Naito, how will this affect the people around you? I am not the only one among my group of friends who tends to resonate with the aura of someone. If I feel happier, more upbeat, and less easily depressed or filled with anxiety, then it'll be easier for my friends to feel better, help me get out of the rut I can get in when I'm depressed, and overall keep a good vibe within the group. Bad vibes can infect a group of friends and tear them apart. Of course, being happy constantly is unhealthy, despite how much it's pushed onto people that they should be happy constantly. However, it is good to get the bad vibes drained out of your body in healthy ways, then bring in good vibes like medicine for a sickness.

I also feel like improving myself in this way might provide an example to friends of mine who are also suffering in their circles of despair so that they might see what I'm doing and try it out. Practicing the items on that list for my 30-Day Challenge would be helpful to others as well in my oh so humble opinion.

I feel like I could add many more things to the list, such as saying "Everything is going to be okay" with my deep breaths, but I feel like there's already enough things to remember doing. Naturally, I'm going to set up reminders on my phone to help me get started until it becomes something I don't need a reminder for. This challenge feels like I'll finally start to be more relaxed.

This is what I wish to attain with this challenge so I can go through my day without constantly feeling worried or like something bad is going to happen. This is me trying to remedy something that I know I can't get rid of entirely. This is me saying "Look here you, wallowing in life is no way to live it, so let's make it worth not wallowing in!"

It's not going to be easy, but I'm going to do this challenge. Improving yourself is not an easy task, but this challenge provides an incentive to do it as not only am I improving myself but I'm doing something I want to do for a class.

woah that's new i actually want to do class now because of this challenge

To any of you who would like to read anything I write on Wattpad instead of on here for that little bonus part of this challenge, you will it here in this work, among writings of my past for when I just had to get something out of my head and into text or on paper. I'll update on how the challenge is going every now and then.

Thank you for reading and peace out.

Initial Post of an Odd Welcome

Why hello, me. This is a practice post of sorts. Welcome to a new blog, a new day, and a new class. Here, I sit. I sit in my Creative Writing class where in a not so new move for a high school class, we're using the internet to do stuff. However, in a new move that I have never done before in any class, we're making a public blog with two different projects/themes. One for one quarter, one for another. The first will be a 30-Day Challenge.

I'm sure that anyone can guess that tired little me does not have a single idea to do besides blog everyday and I can barely wake up on time every day. I'd try that, but weekends are for sleeping.

So, about myself. May as well so I can get used to this and so any lovely reader such as yourself can get to know a random person on the internet they've only just discovered.

I write novels. I prefer fantasies, dystopias, or pretty much anything fiction. Fantasies, dystopias, and other genres among those lines are my element. Other than writing, what other sorts of stuff do I like to do? Well...

I read and I write, I sing and I dance. Performing in musicals is something I love, and so is playing video games, board games, and Dungeons and Dragons. Yes, I roll tiny dice shaped like various polyhedrons. I like big words as they help me compensate for my short height, and I like small things because they make me feel cute. I'm a lover, I'm a fighter, I'm a weirdo. Don't think I'll ever forget an Oxford comma. I read lots of books and other sorts of things, such as webcomics, Homestuck for example.

Yes, I'm one of those people.

I wear big glasses because I hate seeing the bottom of my frames and also because my vision is absolutely dreadful. Blue is my favorite but winter is not, and I enjoy the greatness of hot chocolate. I'll stand up for people but sometimes not myself. My mind is plagued with a mental disorder, possibly two, so don't mind me as I walk through the crowd of sheep with my head in and above the clouds on a whole another level.

Sweet or sour? I prefer sweet things because no one likes a sour person, and besides, why not both? I can speak a little of many languages including Japanese, Spanish, and a tiny bit of ASL. Music is my muse and provides a rhythm to things that otherwise would be left silent. Yes, even this little practice post! I write it with a rhythm in my fingers and it's flowing pretty nice but slips up every now and then. Like there.

I'm sarcastic and I speak my mind. Blunt is what I tend to be but hey if you really need it, we'll dump some sugar on it. I give great advice but sometimes don't even accept it myself. Imagery is fun, a picture painted with your own mind. Imagination moves the world more than money and steel. Maybe my perspective has to do with the fact that I'm technically an Aquarius to most people? I was born on a cusp you see. Capricorn or Aquarius, or how about a Capriquarius or Aquacorn? I usually orient with the sign known as the Water Bearer, which people find interesting that it's not a water sign. I concern myself with all sorts of things that I wish other people would be concerned about.

Gender fluid, polyamorous, bisexual, panromantic. These are the stickers I've put on myself, along with short, fiery, and blue-eyed. I can get fired up or I can get lowered down but no matter what happens I'll always be around.

As for some cons, I tend to be lazy. I'm easily tired and can be quickly irritated. I procrastinate a lot (isn't that a surprise?) and I can be either too loud or too quiet, too boring or too much, thinking too much or thinking not enough. Sarcasm is my medium until I must defenestrate it for a bit.

So hopefully from that, you now have some idea of the things that will be on here other than classwork. Therefore, welcome to the blog of a most curious individual. It's very nice to see you here even though I can't physically see you. Welcome to the blog of a weirdo whose mind is not among the singular mass.

Welcome to the blog including the shenanigans of a weird creative writer.